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Religion: Costanzaism

Contents 1 Definition 2 Glossary 3 Diety: 3.1 George Costanza 4 Saints: 4.1 Kramer 4.2 Newman 4.3 Jerry 4.4 Elaine 5 Holy Book: 6 Creation 7 Divisions of Faith for Costanzaites 7.1 Schmoopeys 7.2 Jackies 7.3 Newmans 8 Symbols 9 Weekly Ritual Schedule 10 Beliefs 11 Holidays 12 Hymns/Practices/Prayers 13 Criticism of Costanzaism

[edit] Definition

An organized community consisting of Seinfield viewers (whether they realize they are a part of the religion or not) whose worldview is to act the oppisite of how the world expects you to. Which helps them relate to their diety George Costanza by acting the way he would in daily situations.

[edit] Glossary

• Cereal - sacred food to be eaten on Thursdays
• Elaine - Patron Saint of Dating and Knowledge
• Externalist- same as activist, those who fight outwardly for Costanzaism.
• Festivus - a holiday observed in Costanzaism by the Schmoopeys and the Jackies where three events take place during the Christmas season
• Internalist- same as quietist,those who are concerned with the internal struggle in Costanzaism.
• J Peterman Catalog - holy book which contains worldly and sophisticated clothing with meaningful stories and desciptions of the clothing. Elaine wrote for it, and followers purchase clothing from the catalog.
• Jackies - the middle level of Costanzaism. These followers concentrate on the laws of Costanzaism.
• Jerry - Patron Saint of Comedy
• Kramer - Patron Saint of Enterpenuership
• Muffin Tops - sacred food to be eaten on Thursdays
• Newman - Parton Saint of the Postal Service
• Newmans - the lowest level of Costanzaism. These are the followers who do not always realize they are a member of Costanzaism.
• Schmoopey - the highest level a follower can obtain in Costanzaism. This level of Costanzaism is a reflection of the George and the Saints. (Berger)
• Soup - sacred food to be eaten on Thursdays
• Summer of George - taking as much summer vacation as possible as well as dedicating time to George

[edit] Diety:

[edit] George Costanza

• George is a middle aged man who still lives with his parents. While many people would find this to be a problem, George thinks this is perfectly fine. A freudian scholar may say that George still lives with his parents because of his lack of commitment to a serious relationship. His closer relationship with his mother is a result of a love hate relationship with his father. (Freud)
• George has found the sublime path of life through his lackadaisical lifestyle. He exerts the least amount of effort possible while still surviving the world in which we live. He has found the perfect harmony between working hard and giving up.
• Originally George was viewed as simply a TV show character, yet over time he has transcended from a human agent to the divine. (Muller)

[edit] Saints:

[edit] Kramer

• Enterpenuership
• Kramerites - The Kramer Faction
  • Some Costanzaites have felt dissatisfied with "sublime path of life" George has laid out for his followers. Instead of turning away from the faith, these followers have found a new and righteous path through Saint Kramer. The Kramerites have chosen a path of failure but manage to find the perfect way to survive and succeed in every situation. Many Constanizites, especially the Schmoopeys, view the Kramerites as lost wanderers who have given up on their faith. The Schmoopeys serve as a model of Costanzaism while at the same time Costanzaism served as a model for The Kramer Faction. (Geertz)

[edit] Newman

• Patron Saint of the Postal Service

[edit] Jerry

• Patron Saint of Comedy

[edit] Elaine

• Patron Saint of Knowledge/Dating

[edit] Holy Book:

J Peterman Catalog The Holy Book is a compliation of fashion clothing and assessories. It is written in language which is easy for even the average Newman to understand. The Catalog is intended for the everday Costanzaite and reading a passage from the Catalog is as if one is accepting a message directly from Saint Elaine. This gives the passages in the book more authority and enforces Costanzites to follow. (Delok) Requirement: Read a passage everyday and wear clothing from the J Peterman catalog

• For follower's convienence, the J Peterman Catalog can be found here:[1]

[edit] Creation

In the year 1989 in an Upper West Side grocery store in Manhattan, perpetually disgruntled resident Larry David was making humorous observations about his setting with Jerry Seinfeld. In the Frozen TV Dinner aisle, David realized that his observations had deeper meanings. He had a self-revelation that such observations could be more than a lifestyle; it could be a religion. The next day, he went to NBC Studios at the Rockefeller Center and pitched the story. During his meeting with NBC executives, David had a vision of any awkward, inappropriate, or catastrophic encounter he had in his lifetime. The person recounting these events was a rotund, bald man who was sitting in the living room of his parents' home. David realized that this was his inner self. He discovered the significance of what he was doing by pitching a show. It was not just a show; it was a religion. Through this, David externalized his ideas and created a new idea of the world as Costanzaites would see it. (Berger) He believed this duality between himself and this bald headed man, who called himself "George," marked the impetus of a new religion, "Costanzaism." The father (David) with the son (George), formed a holy duality which consequently sparked a major religious movement when NBC began airing "Seinfeld" in late 1989.

[edit] Divisions of Faith for Costanzaites

[edit] Schmoopeys

• These individuals are the who have reached the highest division of Costanzaism.
• These are the most devoted individuals who focus their lives on George and the sublime path he has shown them.
• They are easily idenitified by a heart tattoo which appears on the inside of their wrist.
• Schmoopeys also have a tendency to see the creation story from a different perspective. They believe Larry David and George placed them at the top of Costanzaism because they are the purest and most devoted followers. These are the followers who began watching the show from its beginning (Manu).

[edit] Jackies

• These individuals fall into the middle division of Constanzaism
• They are extremely focused on the laws and rights of Costanzaism. They follow all of the rituals and practices to a T but because of their compulsion to complete everything by the rules they lose sight of the true goal which is gaining a connection with George.

• They can be identified with a small tattoo of a balance on the inside of their wrist.
• The Jackies tend to see more of the specifics of the creation story.
  • As this is true, the Jackies have created a serious distinction for themselves between the sacred and the profane, specifically on Thursdays, the Holy Day. All things sacred such as the foods must be followed and all other foods are considered profane that day and cannot be consumed. (Durkheim)

[edit] Newmans

• These individuals are considered the lowest division and are the farthest away from George. Some do not even know they are a member of the religion. Lincoln would view the Newmans as minimalists while he would see the Schmoopeys as maximalists. (9/11)
• These individuals can be identified by no tattoo or a tattoo of the Postal Service symbol on the inside of their wrist.

[edit] Symbols

Mets Logo

• The Mets logo is a symbol of equality and building community within Costanzaism. This is because the Mets are George's favorite team and by cheering for them it brings them closer to George. Making the Met's logo a model for community in Costanzasim. (Geertz)

Aluminum Pole

• The aluminum pole symbolizes the beginning of Festivus.

Postal Service Logo

• Symbol some Newmans will have on their body at all times to identify themselves

Balance/Weights

• Symbol all Jackies have on themselves at all times to be easily identified

Heart

• Symbol all Schmoopeys have on themselves to show their whole heart is devoted to George and Costanzaism

[edit] Weekly Ritual Schedule

Monday: The day of good deeds

• Good deeds that backfire are signs of spiritual fulfillment

Tuesday: Saint Kramer's Day

• Pay unexpected visits to your neighbors in honor of Saint Kramer

Wednesday: Day of nothing

• Day to sit around and enjoy doing nothing

Thursday: Holy Day

• Day of renewal:
  • Eat sacred foods: cereal, soup, and muffin tops.
  • At 9 P.M. self-evaluation through the watching of the show takes place. Once self-evaluation is complete, you will receive a blessing from George and become strengthened for the week ahead. Followers will know they have received the blessing when they hear the sound from the end of the show.sound clip

Friday: Movie Night

• Watch a movie with friends in honor of the Saints.

[edit] Beliefs

• The Jackies are focused on rules and laws of Costanzaism, which prohibts them from fully submersing themselves in the true meaning of Costanzaism. Due to their immense focus on the rules, the Jackies are incapable of setting aside a day to do nothing, therefore sacrificing their relationship to the supreme deity George. (Jihad/Martyrdom)
• There is an internal and external power struggle within Costanzaism between the Jackies and the Schmoopeys. The Jackies consider themselves to be externalist, trying to obtain the highest level within Costanzaism. They do this by fighting for the laws and trying to convert others outside of the religion to Costanzaism. The Schmoopeys on the other hand, consider themselves to be internalist because they have already obtained the highest level. They therefore focus on improving themselves and their own walk with George.(Buddhist Nuns)
• The most faithful followers, Schmoopeys, believe that Costanzaism is the only true religion, no other religion exists. For them, Costanzaism answers all of the questions they have about life, it gives them a path to follow and a goal to work towards. They have surrounded themselves in their faith. (9/11)
• There are so many followers of Costanzaism because it is so simple to understand and practice, that many do not even realize they are practicing Costanzaism.(Going to hell)

• Pilgrimage
  • Everyone within Costanzaism must take a yearly pilgrimage to a Mets game. During the journey to the Mets game, the followers are to focus themselves on George and be consumed with Costanzaism. Upon the entrance of the ball park, all followers become equal and can partcipate together to cheer on their team and feel a oneness with George. After the game has ended and the followers leave the stadium, they reenter into their individual levels of Costanzaism. All particpants must wear jeans, sneakers, a Mets Jersey, and a Mets hat. (Virabhadra)
  • Followers of Costanzaism believe that any Costanzaites who are not properly dressed for the game are not considered to be a true part of the pilgrimage. If a Costanzaite is found with any blue or white combination on, such as the Yankees colors, they will be considred out of place and will not become closer to George through their experience. (Leviticus)

[edit] Holidays

• Festivus
  • Festivus begins with the ceremonial presentation of the Aluminum Pole. The pole is set out like a Christmas tree would be but it is not adnorned witha any decorations. This is followed by Festivus Dinner and the "Airing of Grievences". This is provides an opportunity for people to let others around them know how their friends and the world has disappointed them over the year. Completing this ritual puts Costanzaites closer to George because of his constant disappointment in the world. Festivus ends with the Feats of Strength. The head of the household is given the opportunity to challenge any other member who is celebrating Festivus to a wrestling match. This holiday is observed mainly by Schmoopeys and Jackies. The Newmans are not always aware of this holiday thus maintaining their level as a Newman. This holiday has been popularized by the show. Consequently many viewers of the show have observed Festivus practices during the Christmas season.
• The summer of George
  • The goal of this holiday is to take the longest vacation possible in the summer and make everything revolve around George. This is a time of self-reflection to bring followers closer to George.

[edit] Hymns/Practices/Prayers

• Hymn
  • "Time of your life"

Another turning point;

a fork stuck in the road.

Time grabs you by the wrist;

directs you where to go.

So make the best of this test

and don't ask why.

It's not a question

but a lesson learned in time.

It's something unpredictable

but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

So take the photographs

and still frames in your mind.

Hang it on a shelf

In good health and good time.

Tattoos of memories

and dead skin on trial.

For what it's worth,

it was worth all the while.

It's something unpredictable

but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable

but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable

but in the end it's right.

I hope you had the time of your life.[2]

• This song is sung at the end of the life of a follower of Costanzaism to symbolize how their life changed over time. This song has a direct cultural and historical connections to the last show.(Asad)
• Practices
  • When Schmoopeys greet fellow Schmoopeys, they must say "Helllooo."[3]
  • When Schmoopeys and Jackies greet Newmans, they must say "Hello Newman."[4]
• Prayer
• At the Mets game, the followers chant "Lets go Mets, Win one for George."

[edit] Criticism of Costanzaism

• Some scholars attempt to reduce Costanzaism to simple entertainment for tv viewers, but it is necessary to realize while watching the show, that Larry David's intent for the show was to create a community of followers of Costanzaism. (Genesis, Zombies, Segal)

For an overview of Seinfeld, click here [5]